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Friday, December 4, 2015

Redneck Christmas

Today I am up to my eyeballs addressing Santa letters, so this is going to be short and sweet. I am paying homage to my redneck southern roots. Sometimes it is just better to go ahead and poke fun at ourselves rather than wait for someone else to do it.

 This is a house I see regularly when I am out and about.  Each year they have inflatables all over their yard.  This year they are down to 7, but they live on a corner lot and to get them all in the same shot you have to be too far away to even begin to be able to see what they are. So this is just a shot of the 3 in the right corner of the front lawn.  Sorry I couldn't get the gigantic dead Santa in the picture also.   I call this "Daylight Inflatable Homicide" and I giggle each time I see it.  I don't understand the fascination with inflatables and I sure as heck don't understand killing them every morning!





Thanks to Son2 whipping up some of these last night, my redneck Christmas recipe is Dookie Cookies.  You may know them by the name no bake cookies, or boiled cookies, or chocolate fudge cookies, but I raised a house of males and after hearing them called this one time, the name stuck.  When you look at the photo without using a whole lot of imagination you can see why 10 year old males would latch on to a name like that.

Son3 is away at school in Manhattan and this is his signature recipe.  He has friends with no Southern roots at all who will call him and ask him to make them a batch of Dookie Cookies. (And yes they are all now calling them that also. It seems redneck is contagious.) He even has a couple of paying customers who place orders for them, probably because they have no idea how simple they are to make.

If you want to make these and feel the need to call them something a bit more refined, feel free to re-name them. (And to be honest anything you name them will be much more refined.)

2 cups sugar
1/4 cup cocoa
1 stick butter
1/2 cup milk
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/4 teaspoon salt (we never add this)
1 cup peanut butter
3 cups uncooked oatmeal (any kind but steel cut works)
Cover a large cookie sheet with either parchment or aluminum foil. Set aside.
Mix the sugar and cocoa in a medium saucepan.  Add the butter and the milk and bring to a boil. Turn the heat down to medium and cook for 2 minutes stirring continuously.  Remove from the heat and add the peanut butter and oatmeal, stirring just long enough to blend well.  Drop the chocolate onto the covered cookie sheet and let it set until the cookie is hardened.  This usually takes 15 or so minutes.  Any uneaten cookies can be stored in a ziploc bag in the fridge for a few days, but none ever last longer than 2 days here so I can't give an experienced true timeline. Enjoy and enjoy the freedom from baking!  These actually taste and have the consistency of fudge more than a cookie, but it is still pretty darn good.


Because I am from the South I can freely post this, after all I think the web site The People of Walmart originated  down here  White Trash Christmas

Sluggy from Don't read this:it's boring posted This link in her comment.  I had to put it here so everyone can see it a little easier.

21 comments:

  1. Oh I just lost my comment (again). Hey there's nothing wrong with being a redneck. There are a group of comedians (4 of them) and I can't for the life of me remember their names. But one of them plays the "Redneck" and he is so funny. "If you've ever been accused of lying through your tooth, then you just might be a Redneck." Then there is the drunken Texan "the police officer told me I had the right to remain silent, I just didn't have the ability". My sons are wonderful mimics and while I guess their humour veers more to the British side (I'm the weirdo in this family), they can rattle this stuff off at will - and I love it. Anna

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    1. The blue color comedy tour has distinct types of rednecks. The Urban Sarcastic Redneck, The Suburban Clueless Redneck, The Whiskey in Hand Redneck, and Larry, The Redneck from Central Casting. I laugh because there is some truth to it.
      And for the record: It is true, before a southern female trash talks about another female we do say " Bless her heart"

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  2. Anne, I have to laugh because a friend taught me how to make these cookies back when I was in junior high school and we were sort of addicted yo eating them. I can't tell you how many batches of these we must have made back then. As for the name, we dubbed them Barf Balls, which is right along the lines of your sons humor. :)
    And Treaders, I chuckled at your comment because I know exactly who you are talking about. They are called the Blue Collar Comedy Tour, I believe. They are funny guys.

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    1. Oh thanks Dawn, I can now youtube them. Very funny indeed. Anna

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    2. Dawn, nice to see you had a similar name for these, but notice how much nicer females are with their off color names than guys are?

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  3. We made these cookies all of the time growing up. However, being a group of four sisters we just called them No Bake Cookies. I was looking through recipes when I was at my mother's house recently and saw the recipe and thought that I needed to make them again.

    As far as inflatables, they have grown on me over the years. The house next door put up four of them before Thanksgiving and I am enjoying them. Especially since this is the house where everyone is a mess. This is the first time they have put up decorations so it means. for as least a little while. they were involved in a positive activity and not something self destructive.

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    1. It was just me and My Beloved Sister in my family so we called these No Bake Cookies also. It is amazing what prepubescence males can do to a family's vernacular because my entire family (the female family) started calling them dookie cookies.

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  4. I'm from small town rural Kentucky. We are rednecks and most of us accept that proudly :-)

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    1. Jess I am from Alabama, so proud or not, we are stuck with it!

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  5. Pretty funny name for a cookie.
    Dookie is also a pot term and that's where my mind went immediately. lolz

    Cute song but this is the one I think of when someone says Redneck Xmas........

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P37xPiRz1sg

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    1. I am so tragically unhip I had no idea Dookie had a meaning other than scat. I am adding your youtube link to this post. That was a fantastic redneck song too!

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    2. Well Bless your lil' ol' heart.....lolz

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  6. I haven't had a no bake cookie in a really long time. Maybe I need to make some with the kids.

    As far as the inflatables...We have a neighbor behind us (we can see his yard from our dining room window) who has about 10 of the inflatables in his postage stamp sized front yard. I will admit the kids like to look at them, but I think they are kind of an eye sore, but to each his own. Personally, we don't really have a front yard so inflatables are not an option, but if they were I have seen them incorporated into really nice decorative scenes.

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    1. I understand your kids enjoying them. I am actually ok with them as long as they are inflated. I will also admit that we have one. Frosty appeared on our front porch after ringing our doorbell years ago. One of my neighbors knew I was not a fan of them as did it as a joke. He lived by my front door that entire Christmas season, but we never killed him during the day. Now he lives on our back deck in homage to Fran and Paul. I am more or a front yard wreath, greenery and white lights type of gal.

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  7. I love these cookies! They are on the list this year, taking a bunch to my four stepkids for our visit next weekend. I completely agree with the inflatable thing, I hate them! Lights though I do love.

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    1. Hope all the kids enjoy the cookies! I am a light fan also but I do have one neighbor who puts a gigantic inflatable Santa in a huge oak tree each year. It is kind of fun to see, but it stays inflated all the time so you never see Santa in some weird gymnastics pose hanging over the tree limb

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  8. Happy Santa Letter Writing Day! I'm going to have to try these cookies!!

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  9. I had to ask Captain Google about dookie. Not a phrase I had heard.
    I can see where the cookie name comes from - and would happily gorge on them anyway.
    Happy Christmas to you and yours.

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    1. I am sure it is a regional term and does fit the look of the cookie!

      Hope you have a wonderful Christmas as well!

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